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The guidance of the morning stars will lead the way into the void

It's Ghost concert day!!! I had trouble sleeping last night, because I was so excited. I was on the Reddit forum before bed, and people were talking about what they're wearing and the bracelets and stickers they're making to give out, and it just made me more excited, which might not have been the brightest thing to do before bed. Instead, I listened to some music and wound down, but that took a while to relax me, so I got to sleep late. I'm a little tired this morning, but the excitement will carry that.

I'm working for the first half of the day, til noon. Then, I will hop off and relax for a couple of hours til around 2pm, when I'll start getting ready. I'm not sure what I'm doing with my makeup. Heavy winged eyeliner, outlined in gold, I know that much. Fenty lipstick. But beyond that, no clue. I haven't decided on eye shadow. I think that'll depend on whether my nail polish comes early. if so, I may go purple for the eyes. Or, I may go blue. We'll see. I'll have Jess take a picture when I'm ready.

My pinafore actually came, and it makes my bustline look freaking amazing. I am pleased. I will look pretty for dinner and Papa Perpetua V. (By the end of the concert, I will probably have sweated it all off, but that's okay.

We're going to have to sneak in, so as not to awaken Yoda.

Tomorrow, I'm going to sleep in a bit, probably til 7, and then we'll try taking the dog for a walk. Since the beeping and the fireworks, he's gotten very tentative about going out. We've been having to take him on a little ride up to the school to get him to leave the house. It's very strange, and very stressful.

Then, we have to head over to the bank to add Jess to the account. After that, we have a game to play for a couple of hours. Once that's done, I think I'm going to make some French Onion soup for dinner. I've got cheese and bread, and little ramekins to bake them in. It should be very tasty.

And on that note, I'm going to get myself together. Everyone have an amazing Wednesday!

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Current Mood: enraged
Current Music: Linkin Park - One Step Closer

Entry tags:

Fuck Facebook up its every orifice with bat guano dildos!

Early in the month, Facebook decided that something about the "account integrity" of my account was off, and so it suspended my account. Not Facebook jail, but rather "your account no longer shows up for anybody." I was given one single appeal, probably to an AI, without having the slightest fucking clue what "account integrity" means, or why it means I was suspended. I had that account since at least 2009, Alex has had his just as long and hasn't run into this issue at all. But oh, fuck me I guess.

Worse, the lone appeal failed, and now that account is permanently suspended. Facebook offered me a download of my account's information, which 1. is a bit weird given the "account integrity" thing, and 2. did not include any of my photos or videos or anything I actually give a fuck about.

After thinking about whether I even wanted to try for a new account for a few days, I tried today to make a new account. I had to make a new Google account for a new Gmail address, then tried to make a new Facebook account with that. It seemed promising, though it included taking a video selfie that I don't think worked right because one, the replay didn't display right, and two, I thought "upload" meant "upload a video from your computer" and so after the one that Facebook took failed to replay, I was going to upload one I made myself, since I went through the rigamarole a second time with my computer's webcam, but "upload" did not mean what I thought it meant; it instead meant "this shitty video we claimed to take and then fucked up (and yes, I checked the webcam was uncovered first) is what you're submitting."

And then naturally it figured out with the more accurate name (Fay Arts instead of Fayanora whatever) and the new email address that it was me even before the facial recognition bullshit. (Which Alex has never had to go through.) And what happened instead of getting a new Facebook account was it linked the new account attempt to the old account and gave the same bullshit answer about account integrity.

I am at my fucking wits ends with this bullshit. Does anyone know if there's a way to contact a human being in customer service on Facebook/Meta to get this bullshit straightened out? Because if there isn't, then I may just give up. If this can't be fixed then FUCK Facebook up its every orifice with rabies-infected knives. Even Alex is thinking of giving up on Facebook if I can't fix this shit.

Only other thing I can think of is to come up with a new ID entirely with a different name and email address and so on, and avoid putting any photos of myself on it at all, because Alex doesn't have any photos or videos of himself (IYK,YK) and he's never had any issues. Nor did Pi with his Svaenohr account when he was using it. Not sure how I would tell all my friends it was me without Facebook nuking the account, though, so... not sure if I want to do that or not. Because if I try it and it doesn't work, I'll be angry enough that I would hex Meta's servers with a spell to make all their fucking servers melt into slag.

I mean I suppose I could set up an email account with no connections at all to any of my others, with an address something like "facebooksucksshitoutofanasshole@dieinafirezuckerberg.com" and name the alter ego something like Harry Fangballs or Eris R. Kayahs or something. Though with the enshittification of the Internet these days, I'm worried it might require the use of a VPN to get away with that, even though again, Alex's account is still fine.

Trust I seek and I find in you, every day for us something new

It's Tuesday, and creeping ever closer to the Ghost concert. I'm very excited about it! Sadly the meeting on Friday got moved to next month, so that's a lot of preparation for nothing, and no half day. But when it comes, I'll be ready!

Today, I need to do a bit more laundry, and also find time to make French onion soup for dinner. IT should be a stretch, but we'll make it.

Yoda has been very difficult since the twin traumas of the beeping noise and the 4th of July. He will only go out once or twice per day, and only if both of us are with him. It's somewhat inconvenient. We'll keep trying and working with him, but good lord, our dog is neurotic. He has a vet appointment on Monday to discuss upping/changing his medication. He definitely needs more crazy pills.

Tomorrow, I shall work half a day, and then I shall relax for a couple of hours before I get ready for the concert. Between now and then, I need to get some makeup wipes, because we will be sneaking in after the show, and I don't want to run water to wash it off and risk waking the dog. We're going to be little church mice.

I'm a little annoyed that they cancelled my meeting, though I was not looking forward to driving downtown in the rain and bad weather. Maybe I'll be lucky and the one in August will be less icky. Plus, I'll hopefully have a foundation that doesn't go cakey by then. I'm not fond of the Patrick TA foundation that I have right now. I don't think it's formulated for old person skin. It never seems to really settle onto my skin, always feels tacky--even with setting spray or powder. I'm going to try Haus Labs and Laura Geller to see if one of those works better. We'll see.

Geller markets itself for older skin, so we'll see. I just want something that will look natural. I don't mind it being a little stark for Ghost. That's just the way it's supposed to look, striking and a lttle stark. I found the best Fenty lipstick for it. It's a really dark red/brown. It looks really good, but very striking. It'll be perfect for nights out. The downside is that it takes at least two makeup wipes to get just it off, and in between getting it off and the first wipe, you look like the freaking Joker.

I'm hoping all my stuff comes in time. I've got Lakur nail polish due to come tomorrow, with a lovely color called Black Thorn that I really would like to wear for the concert. Normally Fedex comes early, so we'll see. I'm less hopeful about the pinafore dress that I got. It's supposed to come today via UPS, but it's not even in MD yet.

My Ipsy box will probably come on Friday, which is fine. I didn't have anything in particular I needed for the concert. It'll be here in time for the Philly concert on the 19th, which is fine.

My much needed box for makeup will be coming today. It was desperately needed. I've actually got two coming, one for travel and one for the countertop. We'll see how many things they'll fit. I got a LOT of makeup, which is currently taking up the majority of the bathroom counter on one side.

Okay, time for me to get myself together. We'll be walking the dog shortly, so I should get ready. Everyone have an outstanding Tuesday!

What's goin' on on the floor? I love this record, baby, but I can't see straight anymore

Welcome to T's short week! Sadly, Monday and Tuesday are not two of the short days. I'm sure it's going to be bugfuck, being the Monday after a long weekened. I'm not looking forward to it. I could use another hour of naptime, since Boodle kindly started waking me up at 4am. Little fucker. I rudely picked her up and put her off the bed, multiple times, because I was not ready to get up. Last I saw her, she was sulking over the 5am round wherne I nudged her off me yet again. I am a little bit yawn-y. Oh well. It'll improve soon.

Yesterday was a fun day. First up, we had game with

coyotegestalt during which I inadvertently changed the entire course of the game, because DM's are chaos muppets every time. It may end up TPKing the party, but whatever, it was hilarious.

After a little while, I went to the pool for a little while and did some swimming. Of course, I realized while I was swimming that I forgot to wear sunscreen, so I cut that trip short, but it was still fun.

Then, we had some quiet time, and then I DMed for the homebrew. It went well, though we didn't get into it as far as we could have. It's a fairly large group, and the battle took a little longer than I'd planned on.

This week will be very busy. But first two days of normal work. Then the beat drops, and we get ready to go forth and get our ears blown out. (not really, we have earplugs.) I really love Ghost, but I'm not willing to lose hearing over them. But, I'm really looking forward to it. I'm just hoping there's no visa problems for the band. We'll see. We're going to take a sedan car down, because I don't feel like fighting traffic on he way down or the parking garage on the way out.

I got all my clothes and washed them, so I'm ready for Friday. I've got all my good stuff. A nice teal blouse, a pencil skirt, nice shoes, and some nice copper colored nail polish coming that will look striking against the shirt, and match the eye makeup I'm going to use. Fingers crossed that everything goes well.

And on that note,I'm going to hop off and get myself together, maybe lay down for another half hour. Everyone have the very best Monday!

Current Mood: still crying

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Like a stream that meets a boulder halfway through the wood.

I am up super early after another late night. There were still fuckers playing with fireworks last ngiht, and the dog was flipping out. We're going to have to take him to the vet and get his shots, and get some better anti anxiety meds, because the Prozac isn't doing shit.

He's been just a ball of stress the last four or five days, between the beeping and now the fireworks. Just Jebus on a pogo stick, it's sucked. I was in tears listening to him cry last night and scratch the door.

Aside from that, it was an okay day. We had a nice lunch. Were not able to get the cat's ashes. Apparently the director's son is in the hospital, and things are backed up. It would have been super helpful to to know that before I wasted the gas to go down there, but it's okay. I 100% understand that life gets in the way.

Jess had a game last night, here Strixhaven game which sounded fun. Though, there was some mumbling about "here comes the consequences of my own actions," which always sounds delightful.

Today, we have a game in the morning, run by

coyotegestalt and then we're restarting a former game, with me dming. This is another one of my homebrew worlds, which I'm nervous about, but also excited.

I'm almost done with the game, simply need to make one more character and I will be ready to go. I'm nervous, because this is all homebrew, so I'm very much hoping that they like it. The other server really enjoyed it, so the pressure is on to make this as engaging.

On that note, I'm going to go put on some clothes and consider breakfast. Everyone have an amazing Sunday!

(no subject)

Brian and Emily have left while Mom and I were still asleep this morning.

You were the sunshine of my lifetime, what would you trade the pain for?

I am not really awake yet this morning. It's almost 8, but it feels very early. I couldn't sleep any longer, but I kinda wish I could.

Yesterday was a mostly relaxed day, aside from a trip to Sam's Club. I want to make French Onion soup tonight, so I needed thyme and gruyere cheese.

I am very irritable this morning. I need my morning pills to kick in so that I can stand people. I should have gotten up earlier so I had some quiet time. Now I've got my sister, and I'm really not ready for that.

I've got to follow her over to take her car for an oil change, and I need to be less ready to scream by then. After that, we're going to be picking up our old cat's ashes. (He died like a decade ago, but we didn't have the funds to get him cremated, we did have an empty freezer.)

Then, we have all day to ourselves. We're going to grab lunch, and probably not do much else, though I'd like to get some dry sherry for the soup. Also for sugar cookies. We haven't decided on where we're going for lunch, so I should start thinking about that.

The noise continues, so we had to drive Yoda up to the school to do his business. I'm calling the office today, so hopefully it's something that they can fix.

We had a good game last night, and I had a lot of fun with it.

Short one today, since we need to take Yoda to the school and then go get the cat. Everyone have an excellent Saturday!

(no subject)

Clocked out half an hour early from work without realizing at first yesterday. This wound up affording me dinner and dessert in the break room, where burgers and hot dogs had been served several times throughout the day. In this case, there were also slices of a cake styled after a cheeseburger.

Asked Mom what Brian and Emily were up to when she brought me home. She told me that Emily was visiting her parents, and Brian was sick again. When we arrived home, though, Brian had actually managed to cut that branch up somewhat with the bowsaw.

We went inside, and I asked him whether he wanted to watch Nekopara or Earthbound USA, the latter he thought we had finished, and he went with Nekopara. I asked Mom if it was okay for me to put that on, she asked if that was the one set in a bakery, and Brian declined to see that, turning out to have been thinking of Nyanko Days. He then asked me just to put on Asuka instead, and we watched two episodes from there.

(No point questioning him, but I did seem to recall him texting Marie and Drew from Texas Roadhouse to tell them about Nekopara, after I had shown him and Emily an episode and a half of that.)

Now that sweet's gone sour, seeping down the cracks. Getting worse by the hours, vile rot attacks

I am very sore today. We got a new vacuum and it's a bit heavier than the stick vacuum that we had, and I may have overdid it. (I know, me?) And now, my back is seriously pissed off. Today will be a day for mostly sitting still, I think. I was considering going to the pool, but I think that'll wait til tomorrow or Sunday. I'm hoping it clears up by tomorrow, since I have shit to get done.

One of the empty apartments or something has a smoke alarm that's on battery low, and it's chirping loudly, which is freaking out Yoda. He hasn't been on a full walk since yesterday morning, and it's stressing us all out. Jess is taking him now, so hopefully he actually does some business. Addendum, nope. No business was done. We'll try driving him somewhere and see if helps.

Yesterday felt like a long day at work. We were surprisingly busy, and I just was not feeling it. I persevered and got shit done, but it was a lot. I don't have to work this weekend, so I have a glorious three days off. Then a 3 day week next week! (one day off, and 2 half days.)

My skirts are coming on Tuesday, so I'm looking forward to that. I'm cutting it a bit close, because if I need to go shopping, I've only got a couple of hours on Wednesday and the afternoon and evening on Thursday. I'm going to be up at ass o'clock for that meeting, since I need to get downtown. I don't know what time the meeting starts, so I can't really plot yet. I'm supposed to get an invite next week. If it starts at 9, which is what I'm hoping, I'll leave at 7:15, so I can get down, and go to pick up my badge. I should get a lanyard, in case they don't give me one. It might be an alligator clip, I have no idea.

We definitely will need to do some wash on Thursday, either before or after game. I am going to be stinky as fuck after Ghost. I figure shower first thing in the morning, because we'll be sneaking in. Then we can wash all the dirty clothes, and be ready for the meeting on Friday.

Today, though, I'm going to go put on clothes and see if the dog will go for a ride. or a walk. I'm not picky. Everyone have an amazing Fourth!

(no subject)

Brian invited me yesterday morning to Emily's parents' house for a swim in their pool.

Before making our way there, he stopped at Dunkin' Donuts for a latte, and then at a carwash station. The lights inside the station were rotating red, white, and blue, obviously for the 4th of July season.

At the house, Karen chatted with us for a bit before we went outside. Bill was sleeping on one of the porch couches, and I think Brian spent most of the first part of our visit sunbathing while Emily and Karen played with Maris in the pool. I simply waded about in the pool.

After we came out, Brian spent a while playing with Maris in a kiddie pool, and then on the lawn itself.

-

Brian had offered to take me to lunch somewhere before we'd come home, but wasn't feeling well by the time we concluded our visit.

After coming home from work and debating with me for a bit, Mom asked me if I'd like to grab a bite on the beach while she takes a swim. I went with that.

Went to Tiki Joe's, the pavillion near the beach, and ordered a double buffalo burger, and stadium pretzel, and a 32oz Fanta, for what would become both lunch and dinner for me, and then a Tiki Joe's shake, containing M&M's, chocolate syrup, and sprinkles, for dessert. (Should probably get bottled drinks and sundaes there from now on; that drink was a lot to consume, and the shake was more watery than creamy.)

Current Mood: productive

Entry tags:

I feel productive

Just finished writing 90% of a very exciting chapter, will have to do part two tomorrow or something, as the chapter ended at a cliffhanger.

(no subject)

Mom had a hair salon appointment yesterday, so Brian picked me up from work after my shift ended. He decided to hit Southpaw for a chicken sandwich and some fries and draft beer; I wasn't that hungry, and just ordered some root beer.

I asked him for his thoughts about Asuka, and he considers it overly depressing for his tastes, especially now that he's had a child for a few years, and asked if there is any actual point to it. He did explain a point he liked about Madoka, about that show's whole reference to Faust. I did mention Magical Girl Raising Project and ChäoS;HEAd to both end on a hopeful note, while Asuka ends with Asuka herself musing once more that a magical girl's battle is never over.

In any case, other than anything Mom remembers from having seen that show before, for whenever it's just me and him, I offered to resume Nekopara instead. (Earthbound USA also comes to mind, for whenever Mom is present.)

-----

Marie sent us a round red cake with parts meant to resemble a crab's legs, claws, and eyes, complete with a smile drawn on. At some point, the five of us each had a slice, and I finally got to put on ChäoS;HEAd.

Emily did shield Maris' eyes from the first shot of a murder victim, where I had specifically paused short of to give her such a chance, but soon thereafter asked me just to let the show roll, saying that she has already watched enough true crime to desensitize her somewhat at this point. (She actually asked to see more of what's something of a mystery starting this morning.)

(There were also some violent or risque moments I missed the other day by simply hovering my mouse cursor down the time bar, but this sounds like reason enough now to start Release the Spyce over for her whenever we finish this show. Other shows, with any actual reason to come up, will depend on whatever extent of violence she actually can tolerate, and whether I should alert her to anything thereafter or drop the show altogether would be up to her. Brian should still see more of Magical Girl Raising Project in particular, where actual violence begins halfway through, before we decide how appropriate that show would be.)

We're hiding here inside a dream and all our doubts are now destroyed

Last day of work for the week. Yesterday we put up the second half of our pantry unit, which is shelves. I'm slowly starting to move things over there, and figuring out where everything needs to go. I love feeling organized and having my counter space.

CONfab is virtual this year, and Programming submissions are open!!. If you have a panel you want to see or that you want to run, go put it in! I had a lot of fun with the con last year, and I'll almost certainly be DMing a one shot at some point during the weekend!

I saw an info graphic that July 2 is the halfway point of 2025. Which means that today we're closer to 2050 than 2000. I dried up like the crypt keeper and felt ancient for a while.

Last night, we had hot pot. I bought a hot pot container that has two compartments, and then went on Weee! and bough the meats to cook. It's super fun, and I highly recommend doing it. Grab a few sauces and go for it. Fair warning, wear a shirt you don't like, because shit will get dropped on it.

Then, we had a game, Blades in the Dark, which I thoroughly enjoyed. I'm tying in a little bit of backstory, which is alway fun. Tomorrow we have Frostmaiden, which will also be cool.

Sunday, I'm beginning a new game, which is always nervewracking. It's fully homebrew which is doubly nervewracking. I think it'll go well, but I always worry.

My new clothes for next week should come on Monday, but of course, the blazer that I wasn't even sure I wanted is coming today. The skirts and blouse are coming on Monday.

Okay, time to go forth and get myself together. Everyone have an amazing Thursday!

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When I was younger, so much younger than today, I never needed anybody's help in any way

We are officially halfway through this short week. Two more days to go of work, then off three days.

Next week is likewise shortened for a couple of reasons. First up, we have our first Ghost concert on Wednesday. So I took half a day for that, and then the day after off.

But that's not all.

On Friday, I have been asked to dress up and go down to the main hospital to attend a meeting. It's ostensibly to welcome new employees, but is also a meeting of all the managers, and higher ups. My Boss has decided that I need to get more face time with the big bosses, especially the director of Radiology. I asked what they needed me to do, and was told to show up be presentable and be me.

I immediately went on Torrid and got myself a new skirt and blouse, because right now, the only thing I have that would be presentable is the dress I wore for the funeral. And that might be a bit much.

I'm very nervous about this, and am glad that I have new makeup to help boost my confidence. I have been told that the director of radiology is very "enthusiastic." So I'm planning to put on the perky mask and try to engage her. I've got the compliment in my back pocket, so that's something. She is aware of it, and her boss is aware of it, and with a little luck, the social media blurb will have come out by then.

I have discovered that I need more makeup. Right now, I have mostly purple, which is a good color for me, but I'd really like some blues and greens. We'll see. Most palettes are boring as fuck. When did Urban Decay stop selling colors other than brown? I'm going to have to check out Melt cosmetics. I really enjoy the purple marijuana themed palette I got from them. They also have one called blueprint and the original "smoke sessions," which was mostly green and gold.

Next week will be a busy week. Work Monday and Tuesday, work half a day Wednesday, then Ghost, then off on Thursday, then the meeting at the hospital for half a day. And then work Saturday for 4 hours. It'll be fun.

Okay, time for me to hop off and pay some bills. Looks like my check just landed in my account.

Everyone have an awesome Wednesday!

(no subject)

Emily brought Hanalei over for a few minutes, and then took her and Maris out to play somewhere. Brian and I watched episodes 2 and 3 of Asuka.

-----

A huge branch full of leaves has come down from the walnut tree in our frontyard, clearly from a windstorm we had last night.

(no subject)

Managed to show Brian episode 1 of Magical Girl Spec-Ops Asuka in full. We also watched part of the next one before Emily came down with Maris, and then I went outside while he put on Curious George for Maris.

-----

Asked on TV Tropes for any song recommendations, but all someone there had to offer was three protest songs.

Taking it to Reddit gained me a number of upvotes and too many suggestions to keep up with; got a nice bit of work cut out for me there.

One person recommended Stayin' Alive by The Bee Gees. I told them I actually had read the lyrics to that song before, and while I only asked not for Michael Jackson in the post itself, I was actually thinking more along the lines of Madonna, the Spice Girls, Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, ATC (who did give us Around the World, about inspiration), etc. (Is there a more specific term for those than "pop" or "dance"?) The actual flair I used was "Electronica/Pop" (there was no separate one for disco). Even though that song is specified on Wikipedia as disco, He replied that Stayin' Alive wasn't actually meant to be such, just a general pop song, but also more or less started the genre.

-----

Yesterday was Emily's birthday. The other day, I signed a card Mom gave me with "You're always super special, that's why you are here with me. (Miracle baby, born on the same super star.)" Emily said she was so gonna use that saying, and I offered to show her and Brian an actual episode of ChäoS;HEAd (even checking on my downstairs PC when to alert them to the bloody parts; Brian or Emily could cover Maris' eyes if she's present instead of elsewhere with Mom).

We didn't actually get to watch it. Emily had leave at some point, and would only be back after bringing Bill home from work at 8 (or something like that), and the rest of us spent the evening showing Maris more episodes of Curious George.

Current Mood: annoyed
Current Music: 夏色ofサイダー - 初音ミク //. #calroha

Entry tags:

deltarune

~By all accounts a waste of time

This is just going to be a short post but it's been bugging me and it's not worth actually posting on Twitter since getting into any kind of disagreement on Twitter is stupid lol. But anyway there's a tendency in fandoms for things to lean a lot towards one intepretation of a character situation (Spamton is a poor little meowmeow) then whip to the other extreme as a backlash to the first trend (Spamton is Satan incarnate). Another one I've seen is Sans being devastated by Papyrus dying turning into Sans making flippant jokes about how he doesn't care about his death at all. The overcorrection doesn't fix anything and isn't any more accurate, it's just too far in the other direction to feel superior to the people from the first one. It's annoying! Flattening someone into black isn't any better than flattening them into white, except at least white feels less vindictive.

I think there's also an element of defensiveness for going to black-flattening to try and ward off criticism of being "too soft" on characters ahead of time by painting them as much worse than they are. I'm not one of those dumb fans who ignores their faults! I'm OBJECTIVE!

Anyway as you can probably guess this is about Spamton, who I've mostly seen on the demonized side lately (seen him called the most irredeemable, vicious, evil, unspeakably cruel character in the entire game) particularly given what happened in Chapter 3 of Deltarune. Someone posted a list of his crimes from the Villain Wiki as a kind of "gotcha" about what a bad person he is and half of these aren't accurate or don't even apply to him. >:| If you want to accuse him of crimes at least accuse him of ones he actually did! It bothers me so much I'm just going to go through them here because doing it on Twitter would just start pointless arguing that'd be an even bigger waste of time.

( Overstatement is the name of the game )

The way people talk about Snowgrave lately you'd think Spamton shows up right when you get Noelle, puts a gun in her hands, and tells you to start blasting. :/

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